Since I have been doing all of this traveling, I have decided to come up with some rules for flight. I will call them “Abby’s Airplane Rules.”
- No ethnic food of any sort is allowed onto an airplane.
- No removing stinky shoes from your stinky feet for the entire duration of the flight.
- No singing aloud to a song you’re listening to on your iPod.
- No undoing your belt or the button on your pants if you are sitting next to me… that’s just weird.
- No leaning your body over mine just so you can look out of the window… if you want a window seat, you should ask for one.
- No adjustments are allowed to be made to my air conditioning vent.
- No passing any sort of stinky gas out of any orifice of your body… it is recycled air for goodness sake, we all have to breathe it!!!
- No sitting near me without chewing a piece of gum or not having a mint in your mouth during the entire flight.
- No telling me about your most intimate and personal problems just because we are strangers on a plane.
- No spraying perfume or body spray. See #7.
- No falling over onto me or into my space when you are falling asleep. Gross.
- No talking to me when my headphones are in. They are in for a reason probably because you should pop in a mint.
I think I will start giving a copy of these to the people sitting next to me on the plane. I encourage you to do the same. If all goes well, it should make your flights much more enjoyable. 🙂